


Among the Ash-Heaps and Farce

by rakefire



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: (not an ABO fic), Accidental Voyeurism, Alpha Kylo Ren, Alternate Universe - Corporate, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Badass Rey, Belligerent Sexual Tension, Enemies to Lovers, Everyone Has Issues, F/M, Kylo Ren is his boss, Mitaka is an assistant, POV Mitaka, Poor Dopheld Mitaka, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Rey is a journalist, Save Mitaka, Toxic Masculinity (sort of), Unreliable Narrator, but Mitaka thinks they're both assholes, no seriously
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-09-21
Updated: 2018-10-06
Packaged: 2019-07-12 23:27:48
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,854
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16005527
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rakefire/pseuds/rakefire
Summary: In the corporate world, everyone is someone else's bitch. And, in order to climb to the top, you have to find the right master to slave away for. Dopheld Mitaka is Kylo Ren's bitch and the bitch has chosen right.Until one day, Rey Niima happens.





	1. Character Development

**Author's Note:**

> Set It Up meets Horrible Bosses (sorta) but the only person who works harder than the devil himself is Mitaka.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is obviously a crack fic. I was just toying with the idea of reylo from an outsider's perspective. This might've been done before, but hey, sometimes all we need to blow off steam is a plain ol' shit post.
> 
> Thanks to reylocalligraphy for her input during the brainstorming of the title. I was going to title it FML, and be done with it. ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

Dopheld Mitaka is a good man, an upstanding citizen, and a hard-worker. His parents always have high hopes for him. He's graduated the top of his class, landed a respectable job, and he's got a bright future ahead of him.

He is quiet and reserved—borderline coward, he admits. But he's got a good reason to stay in his lane and not rock the boat: he grew up with five sisters and the only way to survive was to be quiet and do their biddings. That way, he can get what he wants too—albeit taking a bit longer. He is patient and dependable. He likes to think that he's also crafty, but his appearance makes him look harmless—a perfect combination. He knows what he wants and what he's doing. He's got a bright future ahead of him.

But the thing is, life is weird and there are things outside of one's control. And for Mitaka, it's his boss.

After graduating from university, Mitaka got a job at a big tech company called First Order and has been there for the past five years. Since three years ago, he's been working as an assistant to one Kylo Ren, the appointed COO, who's only two years older than him but has been climbing the corporate ladder faster than a gold-digger desperate to marry an old sugar daddy with heart problems.

Kylo Ren (birth name: Benjamin Solo) is a 6'3" tall, 31 year-old man who grew up as a prodigy. His mother is a senator and his father is a decorated air force pilot. He's got degrees in computer science and economics, graduating  _summa cum laude_  from an Ivy League university. He's a cunning negotiator and a clever strategist—the First Order's golden boy. And it helps that he also looks like he's carved from a marble with raven hair, a deep voice, and an imposing charisma. He's not the kind of pretty boy that gets women all hot and bothered; he's the kind of a man that could gain respect from other men by just entering the room—and women (and some men),  _very_  hot and bothered.

He is also one hell of a work.

Ren rarely speaks on daily basis—unless it's necessary, and always keeps his personal life to himself, although he always gets the job done. At first, Mitaka felt some sort of connection with his boss because he also prefers silence and efficiency (this is in contrast with his old boss). But then he's learned that Kylo Ren has the patience and temper as short as the nails of Catholic school girls. Whenever a deal doesn't work the way he wants it to be—or after he receives a call from his mother, he'd trash his office and bark at Mitaka and make everyone else's day a living hell. As his assistant, he's lost count at how many times he has to replace office properties, write a long apology letter on his behalf, and live up to his strict schedules and rules.

Their relationship is strictly business—like, _really_  strictly business to the point that every part of Mitaka's life is all work and no play. Ren would call Mitaka at three in the morning to fetch him some document in a shady part of the town, or make him stalk an enemy (Ren's got a lot of these) from a rival company for days. Kylo Ren is an opportunist and Mitaka is his main henchman.

When he complains about his boss to his girlfriend—now ex, thanks to the Devil's incarnate, he's always told to just quit or file a complaint when Ren's temper gets the best of him (which is not a rare thing to happen). But Mitaka can't just quit because he's been working his ass off for five whole years and he's got a promotion on the horizon. First Order is his chance to live comfortably for the rest of his life.

And, even though it's hard to admit, Kylo Ren makes him feel useful and gives him purpose in life. Sure, the purpose revolves around his boss' orders and antics, and sure, his patience and masochism in dealing with a monster like Ren can also partly be credited to his own sisters' treatment to him throughout his childhood. But still, Mitaka believes he's got a bright future ahead of him—and Kylo Ren's future is brighter than the sun.

In the corporate world, everyone is someone else's bitch. And, in order to climb to the top, you have to find the right master to slave away for. Dopheld Mitaka is Kylo Ren's bitch and the bitch has chosen right.

At first, of course it was because he had no choice. But then the impacts of being Kylo Ren's most loyal follower has proven to be beneficial: he's _respected_ by other assistants—and even co-workers from other departments (although sure, they're mostly just scared of his boss—but it's a good start). A frail and harmless-looking Dopheld is listened _and_ feared—something that he's never known he could get so easily used to. And the money is pretty good too. First Order might be a bit shady, but at least they pay well.

If he has to endure Kylo Ren's shit temper and nonsensical tasks in order to get everything he wants, he'd do it. After all, he's got a bright future ahead of him.

But then something changes.

It started with a call from a media agency called The Resistance. Mitaka has been subscribing to their magazines ever since he can afford his Real Adult lifestyle. The Resistance, much like The New Yorker and Forbes, is the staple of successful corporate men (or the wannabes—like, he secretly admits, him) to make them sound smart and educated at office parties and gala dinners—or just to impress their dates.

The difference is, The Resistance doesn't give a single fuck when it comes to ruining the lives of the powerfuls. They're known for their aggressive but effective investigative journalism. Deep down, Mitaka thinks that the reason why corporate sharks are subscribing to the magazine is only because they want to keep an eye on it; it was just so that they'd know when The Resistance starts sniffing around their company's (allegedly) unethical practice.

And apparently, now they're sniffing into First Order.

It was a young journalist named Rey Niima who called his office one afternoon, asking for an exclusive interview with Kylo Ren.

His boss, of course, turned it down. There's been a hearsay about First Order's business practice overseas regarding the use of sweatshops and offshore accounts to avoid taxes—although it's not really just a hearsay since Mitaka is almost certain that it's true (another perk of being a COO's assistant). But although she's been repeatedly rejected, this Niima girl just won't quit.

And then, after weeks of phonecalls and series of e-mails haunting Mitaka's desk, Kylo Ren suddenly decides he wants to do it. He hasn't met the journalist yet, but it seems she sent something to Ren's private e-mail address that made him agree to do the interview. Thus, Mitaka arranges the schedule.

"Give her ten minutes on Friday," Ren said to him with a combination of disdain and boredom. He's a hard-to-crack interviewee, and based on the previous interviews he's done, Mitaka is confident that his boss will win this one too. The poor journalist might end up crying. It's not going to be her fault, but sure as hell, she'll think of it that way.

_Well, Miss Niima, I'm sorry but no one conquers the Big Bad Wolf himself. We're all going to die and he's going to dance on top of our rotting corpses while drinking expensive liquor made of our blood and tears, distilled in a nice little village in a remote part of a French province. And he'd make sure we'll pay for the bills too._

But oh, he's never been so wrong.

First of all, the interview lasts for forty minutes fifty seconds—four times longer than the original plan. Second, Rey Niima, the journalist, comes out of Ren's office with a wide grin on her face. And third, Mitaka immediately hears an angry roar from behind the door of his boss office, followed by the sounds of things breaking and screeching.

But before Mitaka gets up and checks on him (he has to let his boss calm down first—he's learned it the hard way before), Kylo Ren is already storming to his desk with a stress ball squeezed tightly in his hand.

"Find out everything about the girl," he snarls. "I want to know who she is, who her parents are, her birth date, all of her academic transcripts, her first jobs, where she lives, her favorite bookstore—every-fucking-thing."

"Y-yes, sir."

Thus, gone are his plans to spend the long weekend visiting his parents for her sister's engagement and taking his nephews and nieces to visit Disneyland.

And his research then becomes a constant part of his day-to-day work. Mitaka would report to him the cold facts about the journalist, and the next day, Ren is usually gone during his lunch (and effectively relieving Mitaka from lunch duty). He would come back either with a very good or a very bad mood.

Every time his boss is back with a good mood, Mitaka would receive an angry phonecall or an e-mail from Rey Niima, telling Ren to leave her alone. (And if he's being honest, it's also the highlight of his week when he relays her messages to his boss. "Fuck off, Kylo Ren! You, capitalist swine!" Mitaka would say with a flat tone and a blank expression. "That's what she said, sir.")

Meanwhile, if Ren is back with a foul mood, Mitaka would cower in silence on his desk. It would affect the whole course of the day as Ren would be sullen and agitated. And to avoid this, Mitaka would provide him with another piece of information about the journalist. He's been playing his cards right, old Mitaka. He holds the information—he shares most of his findings, but withholds the quirky ones (like, Rey Niima used to play trombone for her high school band or that she's still listening to her childhood's favorite boy band) as an incentive for his own safety from Kylo Ren's outburst. And it's almost funny that it always works.

His boss eats up the information like a donkey with a bag of carrots.

After weeks of playing detective and being his boss' nemesis' messenger ("Fuck you, Ren, you scummy bastard!" he tells him, before proceeding to recite the rest of the young woman's insults in verbatim), Mitaka realizes there's a change in the way Ren's been treating her. Apparently, he isn't annoyed anymore—even goes as far as  _chuckling_  at the reminiscence of his first encounter with Miss Niima. But Kylo Ren never chuckles.

He just  _doesn't._

Later, he learns that his boss' initial aggravation with Rey Niima really turns into fascination. Ren never really explains his plan to Mitaka in details—he just tells him what to do. But from the tidbits he gathers, he knows that Ren's fixation becomes more than just the need to get back at the girl.

And the questions he asks become more and more... personal.

"Is she seeing someone?" Ren asks him, one morning, out of the blue in the midst of a briefing of their schedule for the day.

"What?"

"Rey..." he exhales. "Miss Niima. Is she seeing someone?"

"Uh," Mitaka blinks, clutching his tablet close to his chest. "I'm not sure, sir. But she does have an online dating profile for a while now."

With that information  _(remember Dopheld, bit by bit_ —he tells himself), Kylo Ren's face lits up and frowns at the same time, as though he's confused with being pleased with the new information, or pissed. After a long silence, Mitaka hears him again.

"Send me the link."

 

* * *

 

 

After the launching of the new product, their work becomes a bit slow for almost a week. Ren then relieves Mitaka from 'online-researching' Miss Niima. Now that he's got a bit more time on his own for a few days, Kylo Ren, one of the brightest minds in First Order the tech company who swears by 'all work no play' rule, finally picks up a new hobby. And consequently, he's giving his assistant a new set of daily errands which then lasts even after their work starts to pile up again.

"I want you to get me these from here and here and here this week," he puts a memo on his desk and shows a map on his tablet. "Do one task per day so it won't interfere with your work."

The memo contains a list of mundane things like gardening tools or groceries—something he can get anywhere and anytime in the city. But Mitaka knows better. His boss wants him to go around Rey Niima's neighborhood and workplace. Sometimes, even in parts of town where she's covering the news. This is when Mitaka figured his boss' sleuthing has gone to become an _obsession_ —and has he hacked into her GPS too? Even if he has, Mitaka wouldn't dare to ask.

"If you see uh a strange man—" (meaning, some guy Miss Niima's probably seeing.)

"—or anything interesting—" (meaning, anything related to Miss Niima.)

"—you report to me."

"Yes, sir." And so Mitaka goes.

Sometimes, he thinks about how Ren's obsession could bite him in the ass someday. But apparently, before that happens, it's Mitaka's ass that pays first.

"So, how am I doing so far?"

A familiar English accent suddenly emanates above him. Mitaka raises his head from the diner menu he's been pretending to stare for the past fifteen minutes and sees Rey Niima is standing next to his table. The tall, slender brunette narrows her eyes at him for a moment before smiling.

"Miss Niima, what a coinci—"

She waves her hand. "Save it."

Miss Niima invites herself to sit across from him, her arms folded and lips pursed. She doesn't look annoyed, but obviously, there's a chance he's not going to get out of there in one piece.

"What's he making you do now?" she then asks. Her tone is almost casual, like it's nothing new. Mitaka is sure he's been discreet, but Miss Niima is a capable journalist after all.

"Uh, ordering lunch," he replies, his voice small. Mitaka is never good at confrontations with beautiful women—not without his tablet and terrifying boss. "Cheeseburger with fries."

She laughs. "They don't have those in your company's rich neighborhood?"

"They... do."

"And yet, you went all the way across the town to get what, your boss's happy meal?"

Mitaka meekly nods.

There's always something about women like Rey Niima. She's the force of nature, a strong-willed clever woman who could definitely kill a man with a glare. Just like his five sisters—or like the head of HR, Brienne Phasma. And that  _terrifies_  him—not in a sexual way, but like in an actual please-don't-hit-me, terrified way.

In a way, he understands why Kylo Ren is fascinated with her. He even believes she could kick Ren's ass.

(And he'd pay to see it happen.)

But that would be a matter for another day. Mitaka starts to feel his palms sweaty under her prodding gaze. She looks at him as though waiting until he breaks down and confesses a murder he didn't commit. She's a brilliant journalist, he knows this—after all, he's been researching her under his boss' order. But in all honesty, Mitaka believes Rey Niima would also make a good detective or federal agent.

And now that he's been caught red-handed, Mitaka's only wish is that she would not tear him apart in a public setting like what she's done to his boss before. That's right. Kylo Ren invited her to the launching of the new smartphone, TIE 8.0, and for some reason, singled her out from the audience, telling everyone about Miss Niima's  _obsession_  with him (which is an ironic thing to say, Mitaka thinks). It was so out-of-character of him; it was as if he wanted to impress her—but in the weirdest way.

But the woman stood up for herself and ended up obliterating Ren with her reading of him in front of his own peers and guests. All was done without missing a beat.

Mitaka could never forget his boss' face after that. It was a low hard blow, and Ren's face turned burning red like he would combust at any moment. Mitaka thought Ren would be so mad he'd trash the party or strangle an unsuspecting guest at the rooftop. But when he found him standing alone in his office later that night, all he could see was his boss' mischievous smirk like he just got off from the humiliation.

His boss is a very strange man. But ever since he met Rey Niima, 'strange' would be too mild of an adjective to describe him. 

Mitaka's attention is brought back to the present when the server is placing his takeout order on the desk. He stands up and scrambles his hands on the plastic bag, trying to leave as fast as he can. But then Miss Niima speaks again.

"Do you like your job?"

"Excuse me?" he pauses, now his forehead is also sweaty. "Uh, yeah. They pay me well."

"But do you like the work, though?" she asks, tilting her head up. "You're his assistant, right? You do whatever he asks you?"

Mitaka swallows.  _Where is this going?_

"Ren, he's... uh..."

"A difficult, arrogant bastard." She smirks, "It's alright. You can say it. You may sit down."

He sits down. "Yes, ma'am."

Miss Niima bites her inner cheek, eyeing him like she's trying to solve a puzzle. Mitaka avoids her gaze and can only stare at his own hands, gripping the takeout on his lap like he's got caught smuggling drugs at the airport.

"I've seen how he's been treating you," she continues. "Don't you want to see him get what he deserves?"

Mitaka's ears quirk up but he's trying to remain calm. "I don't know what you mean, Miss Nii—"

"His comeuppance. For being such an arsehole that he is." She narrows her eyes, "Don't you want to see that, Dopheld?"

Mitaka feels a nervous wave jolts through his spine.  _Of fucking course_ , he wants to see it. Every henchman hates their boss, and Mitaka is not an exception. He timidly raises his head at Miss Niima.

She gives him a wide grin—the same grin she sported after coming out of Ren's office the first time they met. A _winning_ grin.

"I have a proposition."

Mitaka gulps.

And she was right: he does want to see his taller, seemingly invincible boss to get put in line once in a while. Working with Kylo Ren brings out so many perks, corporate-wise. Everyone thinks Ren's a genius, but he's also a fucking nightmare.

During the first weeks of working for him, Mitaka almost always cried himself to sleep. Ren is not a mustache-twirling villain, and actually is a pretty 'decent' corporate lapdog—compared to some shit the President of First Order, Adolf Snoke, has  _allegedly_  done, what he's done is a nice breeze on a tropical island (right before the tsunami attacks—but that is expected of him). And a lapdog that he is, he's still a  _very big, rabid_  dog who could bite and ruin a month-worth of work and Mitaka's sanity when things do not go his way. He's even the most talked about topic during Mitaka's therapy sessions.

Thus, that day after the encounter with Miss Niima, Mitaka is relaying her message to his boss again. Now in a bit more dramatic and childish way—which is exactly how Kylo Ren fights, according to her.

She switches the inside of the cheeseburger with skinless, unseasoned boiled chicken breast (she obviously knows the cook), and draws a doodle of angry crying Kylo Ren in a chicken costume and writes 'BWAK BWAK BWAAK' on its wrapper using a red marker. Mitaka's face grows pale, but he's also very much excited with how it'll turn out.

"Tell him Rey Niima sends her regards, and that he's a  _wittle_  baby chicken Crylo Whine," Mitaka repeats Miss Niima's words. Kylo Ren's eyes are bulging out and his mouth is slightly agape at the display of his newly decorated lunch. He's been speechless ever since he opens his lunch. The muscle under his eye spasms.

"And—uh—Miss Niima also said," Mitaka clears his throat, reading aloud from his phone. "Man up, you sad excuse of a manbaby. If you want to stalk me, at least do it subtly. The whole district can smell your obnoxious Alpha AXE bodyspray from miles away. I suggest you to just come—"

Ren raises his hand. "Enough. I get it."

Mitaka grips the phone and tablet in his hands more tightly, anticipating Ren's impending wrath. He takes a tiny little step backward and counts the distance between him and the door, for a good measure.

Behind his desk, Kylo Ren's still staring at Rey Niima's little gift and his hands are clenched and unclenched. Mitaka's stomach churns.

"So this is how it is, huh?" Ren's voice is low and dark and menacing. Mitaka looks down at his own feet. Time feels like ticking very slowly as though he's in the midst of an execution—and given he's agreed to  _sort of_  work with Rey Niima, he wonders if Kylo Ren can smell it on him. The putrid smell of betrayal in the hands of his nemesis with whom he also shares an excruciating sexual tension (they aren't as subtle as they think they are).

But then suddenly he just laughs.

Mitaka blinks. He then dumbly raises his head at him.

A sudden shiver crawls through Mitaka's spine as his boss' eyes flicker with a sinister glint like he's already hatching a plan to burn down the city. 

"Very well then," Ren finally says. "It's on."

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
> This fic is supposed to be one-shot, but then it's getting out of hand, so.
> 
>  
> 
> [My tumblr](https://rakefiree.tumblr.com/post/178327427912/rakefiree-rakefire-masterpost).


	2. The Coming of Age

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Mitaka's focused on the tasks at hand, the dynamic between Kylo Ren and Rey Niima changes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for all your response. I thought this fic would be all crickets since it's not fully centered on reylo (despite being 100% reylo). :))
> 
> Rey's drawing from last chapter is [here](https://rakefiree.tumblr.com/post/178757962712/bwak-bwak-crylo-whine). (Who's betting on Kylo keeping that piece of wrapper like a weirdo?)
> 
> Aaand, the chapter count went up. But I promise, this is still a short fic. :')
> 
> Anyway, if you find any of the characters' actions to be problematic, please hit me up. I'll put that in the tags.
> 
> Enjoy! :D 
> 
> ~~_(I'm so sorry for whatever happens in this chapter.)_~~
> 
>  
> 
> #SaveMitaka  
> 

Mitaka never considers himself a double agent as being one requires readiness and a strong stomach—and he doesn't have any of those. He only follows Ren out of corporate loyalty and Miss Niima out of genuine fear. Basically, he's at the bottom of the food chain. And there's not much he can do.

After the chicken burger incident, Kylo Ren asks Mitaka to send a big bouquet of pansies, and a thank you note that says:

_Thank you for the lunch. Finally I've got to taste the quality of your writing. KR._

Upon receiving it, Miss Niima is _livid_. A couple of days later, she orders Mitaka to deliver her homemade mac 'n' cheese to his boss with a note that says:

_Thinking of you. Rey._

The 'happy meal', obviously, tastes like a wet sponge marinated in nothing but salt water with an addition of more salt to garnish and for the hell of it, making the cheese almost obsolete. It really doesn't register to Mitaka's head that Ren would fall for it or even slightly  _blush_ when receiving it—and yet he does. But then he recovers quickly and plans his next move. And few days later, Mitaka finds himself reciting another angry rant from Miss Niima while his boss is smirking behind his desk.

Things like that keep going on for weeks. Now aside from his own paid work, Mitaka has to do some extracurricular activities in his free time. He diligently documents their pranks and keeps the scores on a spreadsheet. So far, the result shows that no one really wins because they keep balancing each other out. And if he thought Ren was stubborn and immature, he later learns that Rey Niima is the other half. But obviously, the only one losing here is the assistant.

_Always_ the assistant.

And thus, Mitaka’s weekly schedule has become more _colorful_ than ever before. Sometimes he has to go miles to fight Ren and Miss Niima’s battle for them. Once, upon learning about Rey Niima’s date reservation (Mitaka didn’t even ask how his boss knows), Ren asks his assistant to immediately contact the owner of the restaurant and book the whole place.

Obviously, it doesn’t work. The owner doesn’t want to close down the whole place, and it doesn't matter even though Mitaka tells him that his boss is still going to pay for everything. Many of their patrons have reserved the seats weeks or months prior, and canceling them would be bad for business. But Ren insists on meddling with Miss Niima’s date, so of course Mitaka has to make it happen—whatever the cost.

Finally, after few days of reasoning, pleading, pulling the assistant card, and (barely legal) low-key blackmailing, the owner tells Mitaka that he may do whatever he wants as long as his boss compensates it. He informs Ren immediately, and the COO just shrugs and waves his personal credit card and tells him to use it to pay for everything. Later that night, when being asked what to do with all the food, Ren then tells Mitaka to just donate it to a homeless shelter—in his words, “I’m sure they need food more than a _dumb_ banker who wants to impress a woman like Rey Niima.”

The dumb banker, however, really does impress Miss Niima. After the sudden cancelation of their reservation, he takes her to a nearby food truck and have a good time. They don’t spend the night together, but Miss Niima is open for a second date—as per the result of Mitaka's sleuthing near The Resistance. After he informs his boss about this, it is safe to say that Ren’s office monitor never sees the light of the day anymore.

But apparently, neither does Miss Niima’s third date. By now, Mitaka can be found at the diner near The Resistance, talking to Miss Niima, and that’s when he finds out that she decides to not pursue the relationship further. “I don’t know,” she says after Mitaka casually asked. “I just don’t feel it. Wait, how did you know?”

And then Mitaka tells her—is forced to tell her—about the restaurant incident. “Oh, fuck!” she exclaims. “Is that why he was so smug when I saw him the other day?”

When or where they did see each other—or how, Mitaka never knows. But all he knows is it doesn’t do their relationship any good. One day, after Ren’s silence on a public accusation against President Snoke’s order of business in Corellia is criticized by The Resistance, Rey Niima sends him two big boxes full of marbles. The note says:

_Here are the balls that you clearly don’t have. Enjoy playing with them._

_Rey._

_P.S.: Don’t freak out. They’re only bigger than yours._

Mitaka’s noticed that while Rey Niima's pranks tend to be used against Ren's professional or political endeavors (with tiny sprinkles of personal vendetta), Ren's tend to be used against her personal affairs. He sabotages her date nights ("Who in their right mind goes on a date with some stranger they meet online?" he argues), frequents her favorite indie bookstore (which is a two-hour drive from where he lives) and befriends the owners, and shows up unannounced on volunteer programs where she's involved in (and he drags Mitaka with him—obviously).

Ren even goes as far as adopting a French bulldog from the shelter she’s been volunteering on the weekend just to spite her—the dog, however, is then gifted to his mother as he doesn't have the time to do anything other than working (and annoying Miss Niima). Senator Organa, his mother, thinks he's becoming soft and asks Mitaka if Ren’s got himself a girlfriend.

He can't tell the senator that her son has got himself a new ‘nemesis’ instead.

A couple of weeks later, Miss Niima invites Ren (and Mitaka) to attend a charity that she managed to get herself into. It’s one of those events held by socialites, and this time it's for testicular cancer. One morning, Ren receives the invitation from Miss Niima and a note that says:  _Truce?_

"It's an important cause," he tells his assistant soon after he reads it, pacing back and forth while running his hand on his hair. "It needs more exposure and it is our responsibility as men to take part in it. There is no reason why we shouldn't attend it. Obviously. Especially, since we're _personally_ invited."

Mitaka, who's in the middle of replying work e-mails on his desktop, raises his head at his boss. "I didn't say anything, sir."

They attend it anyway—the important charity, with the intention to contribute financially. But the reality is: instead of _just_ a regular charity to raise money, it's actually a 'Date a Hunk' charity—or a 'fun' charity as Miss Niima says, where topless men are paraded and bid to go on a date with the ladies. And Ren learns about the whole thing _much_ later.

Miss Niima, of course, has signed up Ren (and somehow, Mitaka) to _join_ the line of hunks being auctioned. That is how Kylo Ren (and Dopheld Mitaka) ends up being half-naked and _oiled up_ on a stage while older, mostly married women ogling and screaming prices at the top of their lungs.

“Now here we have Kylo Ren, the First Order’s _finest,”_ Miss Niima says with a wink from the stage as Ren walks down the runway—his face is beet red and his jaw is clamped shut. “Take a look at _that._ Other than being the tech industry It boy, he’s also an eligible bachelor. Here’s what you get if you go on a date with him: he will take you to a _carriage_ ride and _spoon-feed_ you desserts—uhm, yeah—and look at his big, big… _hands._ Anybody fancy a massage?”

The crowd goes wild and Mitaka can only see his boss glares silently at Rey Niima. However, the senator’s son is not going to embarrass himself in public—especially not in front of the ladies who probably also know his mother. At least, they manage to raise the fund (and it doesn't hurt Mitaka to see his boss, face ashen and body stiff like a wooden board, sandwiched between two _enthusiastic_  ladies in a literal horse carriage in a broad daylight—courtesy of Rey Niima).

"You do know that this isn't a real charity, right?" Miss Niima tells him while gleefully taking pictures of Ren's carriage ride with her phone. "Most of these people don't really care about the cause. But at least, now your boss really does _participate."_

She then pats Mitaka's shoulder in encouragement before leaving him with his own date—no carriage (thankfully), but a nice and polite widow who treats him like a son.

If Mitaka’s being completely honest, he thinks those two are perfect for each other. They're both disasters with tons of issues to work on: two fucked-up Alphas with ego and sexual frustrations bigger than Mount Everest. A pair of menace who'd rather watch the world burn than to see each other eye to eye. Disparate pieces with kindred hunger for power to take over the world and destruction to befall one another. _Et cetera._

One night, after exhausting himself from running errands across the city, Mitaka (already in his pajamas) gets a sudden call from his boss.

"My apartment. _Now."_

Mitaka throws his head to the pillow, hoping for a brain damage. "Yes, sir."

Later, he finds Kylo Ren in his bed, handcuffed to the headboard with a phone in one hand. And he's also _very much_ naked. Mitaka almost gets an aneurysm on the spot.

After releasing him from the handcuffs with a key left at the cabinet, Mitaka doesn't even dare to shift his eyes from the wall. He's standing at the corner, his back facing Ren's bedroom like he's a wandering child who just got trapped inside a witch's house. The image of his boss' pornstar-level dick, hanging proudly and staring condescendingly at him, is going to burn inside his brain forever.

"That woman..." Ren grits his teeth while shuffling for his pants. "I'm gonna destroy her."

Mitaka doesn't even want to think about what just happened or how Rey Niima (there is no other woman) could end up at his boss' apartment. But surely, things are escalating now. And he starts to wonder if they could just end his life instead of prolonging the misery.

The next morning, Kylo Ren barges into Mitaka's desk and asks him about the invitation they received a couple of months ago. It was for a tech and media conference in Bespin, and Ren was asked to be one of the main speakers.

"The conference is next week, sir." Mitaka reads the e-mail, "You turned down their offer right off the bat."

"Yeah, I said it was a waste of time."

"You did, sir."

"What's my schedule for that day?"

"A meeting with Armitage Hux."

He hears Ren grunt. Mitaka turns his head at him.

"Is there a problem?" he asks.

"Cancel the meeting," Ren replies. "And tell Bespin we're attending the conference." He turns on his heels, and then pauses for a moment. "I hope you don't have any plan this evening, Mitaka. We're going to prepare the presentation."

"Of course, sir."

It doesn't take long for Mitaka to find out that Rey Niima is also in that conference. Just like Ren, she's also a speaker. And apparently now that Kylo Ren agrees to speak, her presentation is cut short by eight minutes. (It's a _five_ day-conference and they could've had different days to present, but Ren's got another plan—because of course he has.)

They meet the day before their scheduled talks at Bespin University for a dinner with the faculty members. Miss Niima, who still seems to hold a grudge due to the time cut, quips one or two mean (but brilliant) jokes about First Order and Kylo Ren at the table. Ren is not the most patient person, but it's impressive that he remains calm throughout the dinner, even casually making fun of himself and praising Miss Niima for her intelligence. But she is not happy about it. _At all._

"What is your problem?" Miss Niima corners Ren at the university lobby after dinner. Mitaka is standing next to his boss, staring at his tablet and trying to meld with the background.

"Miss Niima," Ren smiles. "I didn't get the chance to tell you that I'm delighted to see you here."

"I'm sure you are," she enunciates. "I have prepared my presentation since a month ago, right after they invited me. Now I have to cut that short for _you?_ I didn't even know you were supposed to be here!"

"A month ago, huh?" He looks at his assistant, "Mitaka, when was I invited?"

Mitaka gulps, and darts his gaze at Rey Niima before going back to his tablet. "Two months ago, sir."

Ren sighs, Mitaka can almost hear him smirk. "There you go."

Suddenly, Mitaka feels Miss Niima's hand on his shoulder, lightly shoving him to the side. She folds her arms and tilts her head up, her eyes narrow. Ren looks at her with gleaming amusement.

She then jabs his chest with her index finger. "Fuck. You."

Ren's eyes widened as the woman turns around and leaves. Mitaka swears he can hear his boss mutter, "Oh, you will."

After watching the journalist stomping her way out of the door, Ren tilts his head to his assistant. "Mitaka."

"Already on it," he replies. "She's staying at the nearby bed and breakfast. It's not too far from the venue."

Ren nods before pulling his phone out of his jacket. "Tell the hotel to move our stuff to that bed and breakfast."

"Mine too, sir?" he asks.

"Of course," his eyebrows shoot up to his forehead. "We're not done with the presentation yet."

 

* * *

  

The bed and breakfast's already been packed by the time they arrive, but nothing can stop Kylo Ren from getting what he wants. Mitaka had to coax the tenants to give up their rooms by sending them to the five-star hotel they originally planned on staying—and promise them a shuttle, aside from covering their expenses. It sounds like an easy bargain, but it's not. Those pesky anti-capitalist, media studies professors _always_ have something to say before they agree with the offer.

Miss Niima is still not happy with the new arrangement. And it doesn't get better when she finds out that Ren and Mitaka's rooms are right across hers.

"Whatever you do," she says, her lips pressed into a thin line. "I want you to be quiet. You've cut my time. I don't want you to ruin my presentation." She then glares at Mitaka, prompting him an involuntary gasp. "I expected  _better_ from you," she hisses at him before slamming her door shut.

Mitaka grasps his own shirt, feeling the thrums of his heartbeats against his rib cages.

"What is she talking about?" Ren asks, eyebrows scrunched up.

"Uh—I don't know," he clears his throat, eyes darted to his tablet in his hand. "Should we... look over the presentation now?"

"Sure." Mitaka can feel the puzzled look his boss shoots him.

On the next day, Ren's presentation goes on smoothly. So does Rey Niima's. That is, until they are promptly put in the same panel with three other people for a Q&A session. They are seated at the opposite ends of the loveseat—which is better that way lest Miss Niima would claw Ren's face or tackle him down and beat the fuck out of him. Surprisingly, the discussion turns out to be a lively and engaging debate, especially between Kylo Ren and Rey Niima. But what the audience considers as a fun and enriching banter between the two of them is something that Mitaka recognizes as an actual _duel._

Miss Niima never minces her words and Ren doesn't hold back either. Mitaka sort of wishes she would let Ren win by the end of the session or their journey back to Coruscant wouldn't be pleasant. It's happened before when Ren and the CFO, Armitage Hux, didn't meet eye to eye after a six-hour-long meeting. The short journey from the residence of President Snoke to First Order was one of the worst experiences Mitaka's ever had. He just hopes that now Miss Niima and Ren would be the adults in their deeds—not that he can bank on them or anything.

But then, something happens.

In a blink of a moment, Mitaka catches them smiling and stealing glances at each other. They're still holding on to their stances on the issue being discussed, but there's something inherently different from the way they look at each other.

By the end of the panel session, Kylo Ren tells him to take the night off. Mitaka is taken aback, thinking he's misheard it.

"Have fun, do your thing," Ren says, even goes as far as lightly patting the shorter man's shoulder—something he's _never_ done before. "You've earned it."

 

 

* * *

 

 

But the thing is: when you work as an assistant 24/7, having fun can mostly mean going to bed early. Sure, Mitaka wants to go somewhere and have a good night out or a nice, relaxing massage—but such ideas have been torn from him when his boss decided that they wanted to stay in a bed and breakfast (that looks like it's never been renovated since 1800s) instead of a much better, luxurious modern hotel. Their flight is at noon tomorrow, so with the amount of down time he's got and not much to do, all he does is having a dinner with few other guests before calling it a night. It's been a long week after all.

Later, Mitaka is deep in his sleep when he’s suddenly woken up by a loud thud coming from the next door. _Ren’s room._

The thud is followed by rustles and low giggles. Mitaka sighs and then goes back to sleep. But then—

“Oh…”

A loud moan escapes from the wall. And then, another thud.

“Ohhh…”

Mitaka’s eyes fly open.

He rubs his eyes while taking a look at the clock on the wall. It's 2 in the morning.

He then hears a low, dark chuckle. “Look at you,” Ren says. And then, _fa-thud!_

The tremor from whatever hits the next door’s wall transfers to Mitaka’s—and his bed, since it’s installed right to the wall.

Another moan—a feminine and breathy moan. “Oh, please…”

Mitaka grasps his pillow, his legs curled up to one side.

Another thud. Another moan. Wet kissing sounds. Another moan. A low grunt—a _familiar_ grunt he often hears coming out of his boss’s throat when he’s displeased with something.

But Mitaka is sure that currently his boss is _not_ displeased at all.

He pulls the blanket close to his chin, as though it could hide his presence from the two people next door.

“Ahh…” 

“You… you’re such a cock-tease,” his boss mutters. The fact that Mitaka _can_ hear them proves that the next door bed is right behind his own bed, and that thought alone makes his stomach churn.

“Well,” a breathy female voice which he  _positively_  recognizes as _Rey Niima’s_ is heard through the wall. “You don’t hate it.”

Ren laughs. “I don’t,” he says. “But I don’t appreciate it when you…”

“Ohh…”

“…left me…”

“Oh, Ren…”

 “...with my hands… tied up…”

"Ahh..."

“…naked... and alone..."

"Oh god oh god..."

"...after _teasing_ me for _weeks.”_

Mitaka gulps, the image of his naked boss on a naked mattress coming back from his repressed memory—vivid and _horrifying._  Rey Niima laughs.

“And now,” Ren says, his voice sounds so stern—even more stern than the way he usually scolds his subordinates. “You’re going to _pay.”_

Mitaka hears a squeal. And then a whimper.

“Am I being punished..., _Mr. Ren?”_ she asks, her voice is breathy and seductive. The grip on Mitaka’s hands is getting tighter. Now he’s _fully_ awake.

“It depends,” Ren replies, still carrying his imposing persona. Mitaka hears the sound of belt being unbuckled. _No._ “Are you a good girl?”

_No._

Rustling sounds.

_No._

Another thud.

_No._

A whimper.

_No._

A sound of fabric being torn apart.

_No._

A squeaking sound.

_No no no no. They’re not going to…_

“Fuck!” Ren exclaims.

Mitaka grabs the edges of the pillow and pushes them onto his head. But his boss’ voice is too close and the wall is too thin. _Stupid old inn._

“You’re so wet for me, aren’t you, sweetheart?” Ren continues, almost _growling._ “No—no, I won’t have you cover up your mouth like that—“

_No, please let her._

“I want to hear your pretty moans. I want _everyone_ to hear you—“

_Please don’t._

“—I want them to know that I'm the one who makes you feel so good.”

“Ahhh…”

_Thud. Thud. Thud._

“Yes. Let them hear you. Ugh—fuck, you’re so tight.”

“Kylo…”

_Thud. Thud._

“Yes, call my name. Call my name as I fill you up so good.”

“Ohhhh! Kylo! Please!”

“Yes!”

“Ahh!”

“Yes, baby!”

“Kylo!”

“Yes, come on, sweatheart!”

“Ahhh!”

_Thud. Thud. Thud. Creak. Creak. Thud._ “Oh, my god!”

_Thud. Thud. Creak. Creak. Creak. Thud._ "You're taking it up so well..."

"Ah... ah..."

“You are mine now. Mine!”

“Yes! Fuck, yes!”

And as the sounds of headboard (and obscene noises) hitting the wall become more and more intense, Mitaka can only freeze in his own bed. His eyes are wide open and his heartbeats are racing, but for some reason, he doesn’t dare to even move. He tries to close his eyes to go back to sleep—“OH, MY GOD! KYLO!”—but it doesn’t work. After staring at the ceiling for what it feels like forever (how long are they going to last? One of them must be faking it, right?), he shifts his attention to a floating shelf above the night stand.

There’s a bible on the shelf—should he read it? Maybe loudly enough so his _neighbors_ can hear him? And there's also a couple of candles—should he light them up closer to the smoke detector?

And then, there’s a cat figurine—a nice porcelain black and white cat figurine that’s somehow sitting a little too close to the edge of the shelf. He is sure that it was placed a bit further back when he first saw it earlier.

He blinks and then stares at it as it's involuntarily rattled to the edge of the shelf bit by bit with every vibrating thump from the other wall.

_Thud._ The cat rattles. _Thud. Thud._ It rattles again. _Thud. Thud. Thud._ It rattles a bit further. _Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud._

Mitaka wonders how sturdy the cat is. Is it going to break when it's knocked off the shelf?  _Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud._

_Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak._ What is the cat doing here sitting alone on a floating shelf, with a bible?  _Thud. Thud. Thud._ Does he read it every night, waiting for a miracle?

_Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak._  Does he have a family? Maybe a big family.

Creak. _Creak. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud._ Maybe he's here to support his feline family.

_T_ _hud. Thud._  Working at a bed and breakfast in Bespin. _Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud._ “OHHHH!”

_Thud. Thud. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak. Creak._  So young and full of hope. _Thud. Thud._ "DO YOU WANT TO CUM, BABY? DO YOU WANT TO CUM ALL OVER THIS COCK?" _Thud. Thud. Thud._

_Creak. Creak._ "YES! YES! I WANT IT SO BAD!" _Creak. Creak. Creak._ With a bright future ahead of him.

_Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud._ “FUCK! REY!” _Thud. Thud. Thud._ But now, look at him.

_Thud. Thud. Thud._ Life hanging on a cliff, betrayed by his own master.  _Thud. Thud. Thud. Creak. Creak. Creak._

_Thud. Thud. Thud._ “PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE!” _Thud. Thud. Thud. Creak._ He suffers silently—did he see it coming?  _Thud. Thud. Creak. Creak._ Look at him.

_Creak. Creak. Creak._ "YES, BABY!" _Creak. Creak. Creak. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud. Thud._ Look.

_Thud. Thud. Thud. Thudthudthudthudthudthudthud. Creakcreakcreakcreak. Thudthudthud. Swing!_  

"OHHHHH!!"

_Craaash!_

Mitaka silently looks at the mess on the floor.

He is calm, like nothing can touch him anymore. Everything is just noise and death is always waiting at the door. _So tragic,_ he tells himself. _He was so young and full of hope._    

Behind the wall, his _boss_ makes an _obscene_ sound of relief. And not long after that, there's a sound of a heavy object falling into the bed. And then everything goes still.

He then sits up, his attention fully fixated on the figurine's eyes—still intact and staring back at him so pitifully. The rest of its body is shattered into pieces. 

_Destroyed._

Much like his last brain cells.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading!
> 
>   
> 
>  
> 
> Also thank you, [sofondabooks](http://sofondabooks.tumblr.com/post/178825844044/rakefiree-among-the-ash-heaps-and-farce-rated), for this much accurate moodboard (look at their faces!):
> 
>   
>   
> 
> [My tumblr](https://rakefiree.tumblr.com/post/178327427912/rakefiree-rakefire-masterpost)


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